Thinking About My Sister

Perhaps like me, you look back at your life and wonder how exactly you ended up where you are.

Like dominoes falling, small choices that made sense at the moment but in retrospect might seem to have been truly misguided somehow tip into the next phase and lead to the progression of our lives unfolding.  Re-direct a couple of those dominoes and the conclusion changes completely...or does it?

My sister, for example, certainly enjoys a wonderful life lacking nothing.

Based on her personality as a child, it's not surprising at all.  Everyone loved Darlene (as we still do!).

She held her own in whatever games we played, trying hard but never at the expense of everyone having a good time.

She took dance lessons, quickly excelling as a natural performer.

She was elected Student Body President in sixth grade, and I think she was Secretary the year before that.

Always a model student, Darlene earned great grades in school and raised the level of expectations of teachers when they saw my name coming through a couple of years after her.

Everything was going great when unexpectedly in seventh grade she somehow contracted Measles Encephalitis.  Suddenly, she was in the hospital, barely clinging to life.  When I asked if she would be alright, my dad said that the doctor had told him that he'd never seen a stronger body attacked.

With lots of prayer and great medical care, Darlene eventually pulled through.  She had to learn how to speak and walk again, but she was back in school for eighth grade.

Darlene was still loved by everyone, but she went from being extremely outgoing to being much more shy in public, although she always attracted a steady boyfriend.

For some reason, Darlene made up her mind that she wouldn't go to college and would instead concentrate on high school business classes, including typing in which she reached something like 100 words per minute without mistakes, winning some kind of award for that.

She made plans to get married upon graduating high school.

"Are you crazy?" asked our dad.

He said she could be anything she wanted, studying whatever she liked in college, but Darlene affirmed that she just wanted to be a secretary and a wife to a surfer who obviously wasn't on the fast track to anywhere but another pack of Kools.

She made that self-fulfilling prophecy come true.

But her life was destined to take other unexpected twists and turns, including a traffic accident that again was almost fatal.

She recovered and went on to become a waitress to earn more money, switching to follow in the footsteps of my Dad as a hairdresser, finally divorcing from the guy who had convinced her she had limited prospects and marrying the man with whom she has built the amazing life that seems so appropriate for her.

To me, the life she now lives makes much more sense based on her childhood than the twists and turns she took to get there.








She's happily married to the man of her dreams with a wonderful son, two funny little dogs, beautiful homes and everything anyone could wish for.  She's beloved by family and has many, many friends who also adore her based on decades of her kindness and graciousness to all of us.

If you ever find yourself doubting your future, think of Darlene and reclaim your destiny to live an amazing life.