Grotto Bay Beach Resort in Bermuda

Before the beautiful Bermuda wedding, Julie and I spent three nights at Grotto Bay Beach Resort.

Conveniently located just a five minute taxi ride from the airport, it was a logical choice considering our arrival long after sunset.

Between the four-hour time change and having tight connections between our three flights, we didn't have dinner, despite having left our house at 4:00 AM.

In the Miami Airport, we had spent our few extra minutes there trying to fix my dress shoes that had self-destructed without prior indications of transitioning into flip flops.  We hadn't expected a free meal on the short hop, but we were surprised that no boxed meals were available at any price.

The Grotto Bay's restaurant had closed by the time we checked in, but the bar that resembled something out of an old jungle movie featured a delicious 1/2 pound burger with fries for $19.

While waiting for our meals, I selected a Sam Adams Rebel IPA from an array of beers that all cost $8, and Julie had a glass of Pinot Griggio at the same price.  Most everyone else in the bar were on all-inclusive packages, which seemed pretty common throughout that resort.

Between the tree frogs, a nearby ice machine and a rooster that chose to crow in the middle of the night, Julie wasn't extremely pleased with the room that first night, but I slept like a rock.

The next morning, we went for a long walk and ate a Western omelette at Cafe Ole, a snack bar near the Crystal Caves.  This attraction has real stalagmites and stalactites you might remember seeing artificially replicated at Disneyland or Knott's Berry Farm.  Apparently, this type of cave can be found in many parts of Bermuda, making it a perfect way station between the Americas and Europe for pirates hiding treasure.

The caverns are so common, in fact, that we had one on property at our resort, which we could access for free, saving $35 admission at that nearby tourist attraction.  Julie warned me that we had no assurance that the underground pond that looked refreshing wasn't hosting some flesh-eating virus, but I took a quick dip just to say I did, and then went immediately to the swimming pool to have the chlorine do its disinfecting job.

The biggest attraction at our resort, of course, was the sandy beach along the turquoise water.

We went snorkeling every day we were there, and while the fish weren't as plentiful or varied as at Ka'anapali Beach or what we would see later in the trip at Bermuda's Tobacco Bay, we found enough to keep us coming back.  It can add a bit to the excitement of spotting a camouflaged fish hiding along the coral or the rare brightly colored fish when they aren't everywhere you look.  Sometimes, there would be considerably more fish swimming around the sunken ship on which coral grew, possibly indicating fish food had been dispersed, as the dive shack said happened sometimes.

That possibly accounted for the warm water being a bit cloudy by the sunken ship.

The resort had a large inflated island with a slide accessible by something similar to a rock-climbing wall, a trampoline, a swing and more.  Many of the features worked better in theory than in actual practice, but provided fun diversions for kids of all ages, including me.

Between swims, we would relax in lounge chairs under umbrellas or sit under my big brimmed hat I bought in Cabo in a chair with legs in the water.

For lunch, we walked to the Grotto Bay's Bayside Terrace Grill to split a burger and fries on our first full day and then a turkey club sandwich on the second day.

The only night we had dinner in the area beyond that first night, we walked over to The Swizzle Inn, to try out the venue where Julie and I would be hosting the rehearsal dinner on Friday.  That responsibility of the groom's parents had Julie and me fretting for months, so we wanted to check out the quality of the food for ourselves.  If it was terrible, we might be able to change plans.

We ordered a half pitcher of their signature  drink, the Rum Swizzle, which Bob Hope described as "an orange slice, a lime slice, and a cherry, all floating in 8 ounces of hangover."

It's a tasty drink that goes down way to easily.  There was a brisket sandwich on special, and while that wouldn't be on our menu for the hosted dinner, we were happy when it turned out to be delicious.  The ambiance was something of a rowdy bar, but we knew we had a quieter, more upscale private room reserved for our party, which Julie checked out while I struck up a conversation with a local.

When Jay and Sasha announced their wedding would be in Bermuda, we originally planned to spend a few days on the east coast visiting our daughters and then pop over to Bermuda for just a couple of nights.

After further review of the economies of alternative days for cashing in air miles, Julie found a special at the Grotto Bay Beach Resort.  We decided it made the most sense to leverage our flights to that beautiful island into a longer stay there.


As we became regulars on our beach, we got to know others staying at the resort, including a guy from New York who was there with his wife and two adult daughters, enjoying all of the amenities.  He said they usually go to St. Thomas, and in fact usually stayed at the same Marriott where Julie and I stayed a few years ago, but it had been closed for refurbishing following some storm for these dates, forcing a last-minute change of destination.  The man, who had a strong Bronx accent, said he had recently retired.  His 24-year-old daughter said she wanted to retire, bringing a hearty laugh from all of us longing to hold onto our youthful vigor.

When we moved to the sanctioned wedding event's hotel in St. George's, we saw that same family snorkeling at Tobacco Bay on our first morning there.  Even on an all-inclusive package like they were, you can always take a road trip to see what else is on another part of the island.

Another character we encountered in Grotto Bay was what I called a Chameleon Gecko.  He changed to beautiful hues of teal and burgundy depending on what he could see, apparently.  I looked up the species this morning, and it turns out he was what Bermudans call a Warwick Lizard, which is actually an Antiguan Anole.  Native to the islands of Antigua and Barbados, his ancestors probably arrived on pirate or slave ships long ago, although unlike lounge lizards who come to Bermuda by plane to sip Rum Swizzles or Dark-and-Stormies, they had no way to find their way home.