Family Effort?

Warnemunde, Germany

There's a lot in the news lately about equality of marriage for gay people.  Without getting into that controversy, perhaps those of us in a traditional marriage should re-consider our efforts to maintain a happy family.

A couple of days ago, I listened to an Anthony Robbins recording.  While he may not be as controversial as gay marriage, he certainly is admired and followed by many and considered a blowhard joke by others.  I proudly fall into the former category, because I think he makes very strong points, even if my efforts in lofty professions like screenwriting and album producing have resulted in dismal financial flops rather than amazing success stories as his client testimonials claim.

Darlene, Dad, Wes and Mom

In any case, Tony (yeah, he's a close enough advisor after all these years that I call him Tony now) made what I considered another brilliant observation.  He said we are all taught that we get rewards that our efforts warrant.  That sounds logical, right?  When he asked the crowd in attendance what kind of reward we get if we make a poor effort, everyone in his live audience yelled back, "Poor!"

"Wrong," he said.  If you make a poor effort, you get NO reward.  If you think about that, it is completely true.  And whereas if you're the only one doing something, an excellent or even good effort might result in great success, in looking at the highly competitive world in the 21st century, I have to agree with his next three observations too:




Laszlo, Gina, Amy, Jay and Julie

Good Effort: Poor Reward

Excellent Effort: Good Reward

Outstanding Effort: All the Rewards Possible

As Tony observed, that's why someone comes up to him at a seminar and says he doesn't understand why his wife left him when he was a good husband.  What the "good" husband believed in his heart should yield good results instead gave him a poor reward: divorce.  The hard pill to swallow is that he did get the reward he earned.

Most of the boys in my neighborhood growing up would have loved their dads to spend more time playing sports with them.  I know I did.  The exceptions were the Rungo boys. Mr. Rungo devoted a lot of time to playing sports with his three sons, and the last time I saw him, right after my mom's death, he was still very close with them.  I'm not sure about his efforts with his wife, because despite knowing him for 50 years, I never saw his wife come out of the house, but without question he was rich with love and quite happy.

Uncles Bob, Herb & Leroy, Aunts Pete & Delmae, Dad

My dad was more like other dads who grew up in the Depression.  He devoted most of his time to working, to make sure his kids "had shoes like the other kids." His love for his kids was just as strong as Mr. Rungo's for his kids.  On Sundays for many years we had a family day, where we would go horseback riding, archery target shooting or visiting exotic bird farms.  And
 as my sister observed a few days ago, we really were fortunate to have the perfect mom and dad for us. We were lucky to have grown up in really an ideal situation in a great place, Westminster, California.  We had very happy childhoods, including summer trips where we would drive across country to see landmarks and visit extended family members.



Copenhagen, Denmark

Back in the 1960s, cruising (and actually air travel) wasn't something the average American family (and we fit right in there) considered too much. Norwegian and Carnival hadn't invented destination cruising in the Caribbean yet, and while Mark Twain may have traveled extensively throughout the world by cruise ship, most Americans didn't have that in their consciousness until The Love Boat television show in the 1970s.

Just as we now accept a world with microwaves and cell phones, American families should recognize the breakthroughs in family travel afforded by the ever-growing cruise industry.  For the price of staying home to entertain out-of-town visitors or be the visiting family ourselves, we can see the world from a floating resort.  While you may scoff at that, you should re-consider what you actually spend on a road trip or even a "staycation."

If your family is strapped for money, I don't advise taking a cruise.  Get your financial house in order and enjoy small activities at home, like a family meal or walk along the beach together.  Even if you have the means to travel, you shouldn't ignore the day-to-day special moments at home.

But if you have the means, and from what I can tell many people find themselves better off than ever, why not make an outstanding effort for your family vacation travel?

While my poor marketing and outreach efforts may condemn my artistic endeavors to failure, I can definitely say that I have reaped rich rewards from my family efforts, including with regard to my own travel. Tony must be very proud.

Better service leads to better trips!