Like Holidays at Your Favorite Aunt's Home?

A few days ago on facebook, my cousin Darlene spontaneously shared that her favorite holiday memories were Thanksgiving, Christmas and Easter at Aunt Mary's, and soon other cousins and I all chimed in to concur, though for me Aunt Mary was Mom.

If I haven't stressed it enough previously, Mom was an amazing woman.

Always warm and welcoming, she made everyone feel at home.

She and Dad made great efforts to furnish our home comfortably as well as aesthetically pleasing.

I remember my friend Dave Smeaton coming into my living room one Saturday morning on the way to play baseball and saying how beautiful everything was.

That was the first time I looked around and realized that, yes, the couches and chairs were really in excellent condition, and the dramatically framed original paintings by local artists along with blown glass objets d'art from Virginia's Gift Shop at Knott's Berry Farm which mom and dad had gradually accumulated over time had indeed made my cookie-cutter house into something quite special in my blue collar neighborhood.


Dave appreciated it like he had just entered a Habsburg's Palace, and when I told him to have a seat while I finished whatever it was I had to do, he asked, "Would that be alright?"

"Of course."

He sat on the couch, but with only a couple inches of his rear perched on the edge of the couch, as if it was an antique Louis XIV settee in a museum.

Before him sat a beautiful covered crystal candy dish holding individually wrapped taffies and truffles, which of course drew the rapt attention of a 10 year-old boy.

He didn't have to ask.

"Sure, have as many as you like."

Whether it was candy, Shasta sodas in the refrigerator or adding a place at the dinner table, everyone was always welcome to have what they wanted at our house.



In fact, on Saturday evenings, my Dad would frequently bring one of the street characters from his beauty salon to share the big weekly family meal that Mom always made.

If playground friends and down-on-their-luck strangers were welcome at "Aunt Mary's," imagine how welcome she made family feel.

Family was the most important thing in Mom's life.

I remember one time she told me that she loved her family more than anything, and having just returned from Sunday School, I self-righteously said, "Except God."

"It might be a sin, but I think sometimes I love you kids even more than God."

As I've aged, I have grown to understand what she meant.

On those holidays, Mom would have Dad and I bring in the big green piece of plywood that we used as a ping pong table in summertime and set it atop the pool table, which we'd previously repositioned to one side of our glass-covered patio, where it would be covered by table cloths and serve as a banquet table for the holiday party, creating space for foldout tables.

Starting the preparation of cleaning and cooking days in advance, Mom would be awake well before the sun on party day to begin slow roasting the turkey and fixing other special dishes, including lots of fabulous desserts.

Mom's side of the family always welcomed us on trips to Alabama with similar feasts, which is where Mom learned that brand of loving hospitality growing up with an incredibly sweet Mama of her own.  In California holiday parties, attendees were Dad's siblings and their families,

The parents all seemed happy, drinking coffee and talking, which looking back seemed like the "wah wah wah" of adults speaking in a Charlie Brown cartoon.

When I occasionally understood what they were saying, it was because they were bragging about their kids (and my own kids will know exactly what this is like), which the kids found embarrassing enough to try to get out of ear shot, or discussing politics, which as kids none of us cared about a whit.

For me, the parties were primarily about getting together with all the cousins, playing games like Tripoli packed into our small den or running around outside, but I always loved those meals, too.

It seemed like everyone had all their favorite foods at the big feast --- and make no mistake, they truly were feasts --- and particularly marvelous feasts at that!

Every time.



There were dishes that must have been featured in some Orange County women's magazine that Julie's mother and Mom both read, because Julie remembers some of the same dishes that have since become less fashionable or even extinct.

Fruit-enhanced Jello with a layer of whipped cream in between levels.

Seven-Up punch, in which scoops of lime sherbet floated around in foamy lemon-lime soda to be scooped from a crystal punch bowl.

Waldorf Salad either made traditionally with mayonnaise or as "Fruit Salad" with Cool Whip.

And, of course, standard favorites like either ham with pineapple on top or turkey with dressing, mashed (my favorite) or scalloped potatoes, creamy gravy, fresh-baked Bridgeford Rolls, lots of vegetables including marshmallow topped yams (though I only ate peas and corn), pumpkin pie, lemon or chocolate bundt cake, and plenty of olives for kids to put on their finger tips (with the confession that not all were actually eaten).

When the party ended, clean-up would begin, and while I helped bring out some garbage and did a few other minor tasks to help, it was really Mom who did the lion's share of the cleanup.

Then again, our family and friends never acted disrespectfully of our home.  They treated it much as if they lived there too --- which indeed they did for those holidays --- and so the "mess" was nothing close to a frat party clean-up.

But then again, Mom shouldered the bulk of it, and she never complained.

What do family gatherings have to do with cruises?

Everyone who has cruised already knows.

We always feel welcome.

The setting is beautiful.

The food is fantastic.

And it turns out that the people we meet on a cruise, while not as close as family, are pretty fantastic, because they're all relaxed and enjoying life.

The staff may not be your "Aunt Mary," but they sure strive to be, doing all the preparation, service and cleanup to make this experience one of your greatest memories.

Beyond that, the entertainment is a quantum leap above a bowl game shown on a 25 inch console television droning in the background.

And then, of course, there are tropical isles in turquoise waters or historic cities you learned about in movies or Sunday School.



From a kid's perspective, perhaps the fact that nobody drank alcohol in my childhood home enhanced the experience, because --- let's face it --- some people can't handle their liquor, creating unnecessary drama.

That was never a problem at Aunt Mary's home, which always felt like a safe place.

On large ship, mainstream cruises, there are always Kids' Clubs and teen areas where kids can be kids without worries.

On cruise ships, of course, there is alcohol, which is a factor in choosing the right ship for you personally.

There are cruises more for the party-hardy types, but even then they tend to be a subset of passengers who dance all night and pass out by the pool all day, causing no harm for families on board.

For the most part, cruise passengers don't want to overindulge and lose the beauty of the experience for which they've saved all year.

Would you enjoy cruising?

The fact that 92% of first time cruisers choose to cruise again --- and that includes lots of people who worried about getting seasick, not having enough time at each destination or being bored --- verifies that in all likelihood, you would.


You just need someone to help you get started.

If you haven't cruised, it's time to try it.

And if you have cruised, it's time to return to the sea, possibly adding a new twist.